Our House

My parents are selling the house and part of the land where I grew up. This is very traumatic for me. I'm not joking. I wake up sobbing about it. I'm still not joking. I'm sure it seems very melodramatic, but understand: I did live there all of my childhood, except for roughly 9 months in California, where I was born. I'm very fond of the house and land. We lived out of town, and I had few friends growing up. The majority of my time as a younger kid was spent playing outside, exploring the fields and pastures, and riding my bike a half mile to the old, abandoned house near the river. When I was older, I'd still ride my bike around, just usually the other direction. I would always hope that John Davis would look out the window and think I was cute!
It's upsetting to me to think of other people living in the house, decorating it, painting it, putting up new barns on the land and tearing down the old barn. In fact, I'm sure I've written a bad, teen angst-filled poem about that barn. I'll try and track it down. What a treat that would be!
In my grand plans, I had always thought that any kids I had, would end up spending summers there. I knew, before I had the kids, that because of the divorce, this would not be the case. So, I have been preparing, but I am still heartbroken that my kids won't spend any time at the farm.
I feel displaced. I feel out of sorts.

When I was about five, and felt out of sorts, I would run away.
I would run away to the city.
Now, because we lived six miles away from the nearest semblance of a town, finding the "city" was a bit difficult. I knew that the city was also known as the "concrete jungle", so I settled for the nearest concrete available. I would pack up my little blue polka-dotted vinyl bag and matching umbrella, and retreat to a tiny patch of concrete sidewalk that had never gotten connected to the decks, or house. It was at least 15 feet away from the house.
If I was still feeling out of sorts, and that distance seemed too close to the humanity of my household, I would retreat to a city that was even further away. 25 feet away from the house was a patch of concrete that would eventually hold an enormous satellite dish. It was yet still empty, and I would sulk about. I would huff and sigh. I would think of all the ways I was mistreated. I would eat my snack that I packed and then complain that I was still hungry, starving, in fact! I would realize that even though the city afforded me an independence of some kind, there was no one loving to hear my plaintive cries.
I would pack it all up and go home. I would always be welcomed there.

There is no point to this story. I just remembered it and so I am sharing.

I always thought that I would go home, welcomed, and I would take the kids and husband outside and point at the places where I used to play, or run away to, or not-so-secretly smoke cigarettes. If the house sells, which it eventually will, then that scenario becomes awkward. You cannot wander around property that isn't yours, and point out where you built a mosquito haven or where you found your favorite batch of kittens. Even in the far reaches of the North, the police would be called, and you would be escorted off the land.
So with no visits to trigger my memory, I worry that I'll forget what to tell the kids. I worry that they won't know that for years we had a butterscotch-colored hippie van in our driveway, and that my parents drove it from California to Minnesota, with 2 kids, and I think, a cat. The house and land are very connected to my, to our, memories, and without them, how will I do at giving these kids the history of a family that's now slightly bent? How will I tell them, if I can't show them that we were all happy?

Shameless Plug

Buy this house.

9 month photos

Note the new haircut!

Cookie Karma

Mr. J got an extra special cookie. It came straight out of the package like this. No alterations have been made to the photograph.

Frankie A.

Frankie A. is enrolled in college and starting classes on September 8.

YAY!

We've got his address if anyone should need it.

Princess

We had a very verbal girl over to our house on Friday. She's really just three months older than big T, but is leaps and bounds ahead of him in the talking game.
She was very quiet at first, and so I chattered on, telling her about the house, about T, about M, about supper etc. Children need to learn very basic things that we take for granted knowing, so I told her that T was a boy and M was a girl.
A few minutes later, I decided it was time for her to finally start talking to us. I thought direct questioning would be the way to go about this.
I said, "Do you know his name?", and I pointed at T.
She giggled and mumbled something, and then laughed hysterically.
"What?", I said.
She laughed even more. And then she pointed at him and said loudly, and audibly, "Princess!", and hysterically laughed again.
I didn't even know what to say.

Fall Soccer

Mr. J is playing fall soccer, which lasts through mid-October. E-mail me if you want game dates!

7 Left

7 more drills left...And they still are making me jump through hoops.

Here I am in a DA photo that I had to get taken for a "packet". Lovely, isn't it? Note the institutional backdrop. I requested a fence backdrop, with rolling hills, but the photographer insisted that all of the pictures be "standardized".

Also, I immensely dislike having my picture taken. Can you tell?

If I Were Rich...

I would have this, "chirp", dinnerware:

Here

And in case you actually click on the link and view the dishes that my heart has been lusting after, (Is lusting appropriate in this context? Probably not.), you should note that the price listed is for a 4 piece place setting, not 4 place settings. Oh my.


I would also have "britax" car seats. Today I helped a lady at daycare strap her twins into her van (I thought, same van as mine, color and all, so all along I've been thinking that we were financial equals...).
I have never seen such plush and lovely car seats. All three of her kids had seats that were covered in thick cushy material with extra grippy but soft harness straps. Oh my. I don't think they even sold anything like that at the Shopko when I got my Cosco car seats. I bet her kids never get a neckburn from the harness strap rubbing against their necks on sweaty days. Then she drove away and I stood looking at the back of her van as she headed down the road.
"XLE", the back of the van said. That explains it. Not the same at all.


But if I were rich, I'd still live in this house. I'd just spend my money restoring the basement to its full 1967 splendiforous glory. Oh wait, it is restored to it's 1967 splendiferous glory.
Oh wait. I guess it never got redecorated in the first place.

It's all good though. I'm quite happy with the house as is. I love this house. I chose this house.
And happy with our dinnerware too, which we have many sets of, so I'm willing to recognize that I have a problem, and if I had "chirp" dinnerware, there would just be another type I would be lusting after. And also, it seems that the folks at Lenox have not bothered to make very many serving pieces, such as salt and peppers or butter dishes. Well, how good would that be? What would you do with the gravy if they haven't made a gravy boat? I'm from Minnesota and I need gravy.

And the car seats, I actually did google to see if they were going to be purchasable. I think we'll just stick with what we've got. Because I'm not willing to request car seats for a special treat (sorry, children.)


Dear Frank,

This "If I Were Rich" post is actually for you. A special day is coming up in September. Don't forget. FRANK--I AM TALKING TO YOU--FRANK!!

I want this:

Here

But I want it for 24.99 at TJ Maxx. I scoped it out already. It's there.

And if you don't want to get me that, because we already have a fully functional (although b-o-r-i-n-g stainless steel) tea kettle, then I want this:

Here

It's in the 3rd edition. Someone has been paid 3 times to write and update a book about vintage pyrex.
That person probably eats off of china with the "chirp" design, and puts their children into "britax" car seats. Oh my.

CC: FRANK

Room with a View

Miss M,
On this ninth day of August, in the year two thousand and eight, I grant you your very own room.

I promise.

Mom

Things I Wish I Didn't Know About Our Landscaping

If you read these "landscaping" posts in a certain order, you'll remember that we spray a big Spruce tree (I think it's a Spruce...), with an insecticide to kill something called "bag worms". We pay 75 dollars for this service, that probably takes the man 5 minutes.

The folks that sold us this house were very specific about the care of the place. They even went so far as to write down what they used to clean the kitchen floors. (I'll tell you what, I use it too, I don't want to come in and change the world...)

Anyway, they wrote that we should spray the big tree in back for "bag worms". I thought for a long time, that her note said "big worms", so I was quite terrified, and was thrilled the day the man came to spray. But he said they were "bag worms", and not "too big".

So, because Don and Phyllis were so specific that we should spray that one tree for "bag worms" and another tree for some kind of Maple-tree-eating insect, I was surprised to hear from Frank today, notifying me that three of the smaller landscape trees on the side of the house were going down for the count.

"What's wrong with them?" I said.

"I don't know." he said, "It's like they have some kind of bags hanging from them, with little worms coming out."

Well, I knew what to do far quicker than he did, proving yet again, that I'm smarter.

"Hmm." I said. "I'm just not sure what that would be. I'll have to google for something like, "worm and bag" and I'll call you back."

Well, I googled for worm and bag, and discovered that all sorts of evergreen trees can get something called, "Bag Worms"! I'd heard of that! In the note!

Thank goodness for my quick mind.


Anyhow, I came home, and discovered to my horror, that

• one tree is probably already dead
• they can spread quickly to all the little trees
  
• the man can spray, but it will cost Another 75 dollars
• bag worms can come back multiple times throughout the summer

And

• he makes NO GUARANTEES

So, of course, I tried to beat the creepy little suckers off with the rake. But, it didn't seem to be deterring them, although it did knock some down to writhe sickly on the ground.

Here is a video of the horror. Of course, I didn't take video of me beating the tree with the rake, because the neighbor already saw that and made fun of me.

This is just a little video to share what they look like after they are fat and happy from killing ONE OF THE LITTLE LANDSCAPE TREES!!!!

Also, because I strive to be informational at all times, and because maybe this page will come up now if someone googles "bag worms", I'll tell you that they look just like thin pine cones. Until they move.





He's coming on Monday to spray.

Things I Don't Know About Our Landscaping

Some things I don't know about our landscaping. I'm confused:

Is this a weed? I hate to pull it because it appears to have some sort of flower things. BUT, it seems to grow rather quickly, and also to be surrounding the daisy-like flowers and choking them out. Bully.

Are these weeds? They are everywhere around where the other flowers are planted. Are they part of the arrangement that Phyllis (previous lady of the manor) so neatly plotted out, or are they intruders?

We've got these rosebushes all around the house. Unfortunately, I learned about the Japanese beetle bug by stepping out the other day into an absolute infestation on the roses. First I tried to beat the bugs off of the rosebushes with a rake. It didn't seem to deter them for long, AND my Mom made fun of me. So, Ace Hardware (the Helpful Place), said that I should spread that poison powder on them. So I had Frank do it.

But now, the roses still don't look very full or healthy. Am I going to have to trim some of the dead parts off? Or just leave them?

This is our giant tree in the backyard. It was a memorial to the son that Phyllis lost. So, we pay yearly to have it sprayed for "bag worms", to ensure its health and future wellness.

However, it looks a bit rickety. Do you trim a tree this size? Prune it? What the heck is supposed to make it look good again? Bear in mind that this is a giant. See the roof of the house in the photo? This tree is B-I-G.

Things I Know About Our Landscaping

I don't know much about garden-type things, or landscaping. I grew up on a farm, in the North, on acres and acres of land. I hate to say this, because it might upset my Mother, but I don't think we landscaped our yard. Sometimes her memory of things, and my memory of things differs. Which is understandable, because I'm the kid and she's the Mom. So perhaps I'm wrong about this, and our yard was neatly landscaped. But I don't think it was.

At home in the North, there was yard, and then there was pasture, and then there was forest. I don't remember any "Bob's Landscaping" trucks pulling up in the drive ever, and I never remember my Mom out worrying about plants. She had other things to worry about... Like me getting out of bed and cavorting in the barn in the middle of the night.

Now, the people that built our current home, and kindly sold it to us, had extensive landscaping done on the property. They did it so that it would look nice to potential buyers. Well, that was us, and apparently it worked, because here we are.

Last summer, I was pregnant, and I stayed inside, because it is godforsakenly hot and humid where we live. The landscaping remained untouched. This summer, I have to go outside all of the time, to entertain the small boy, and so I have been trying to UnSecret Garden the place, pulling weeds, watering things, and unfortunately, because it's SO hot and humid here, removing mold from a variety of areas, like under the air conditioning unit...

Here is what I have discovered about the landscaping:

Around the house, in a bricked-in area, and around the little storage barn (shed!), is rock. Under the rock is actually some type of cloth/fabric/tarp. It's not just dirt under the rocks, it is this material to hinder weeds.

These are day lilies. They come up automatically. I don't touch them, and they are fine. Also, pleasantly enough, they come in many colors.

This is a hollyhock. It also comes up automatically. We only have one color of these.
That bug on it is some kind of plant and tree eating beetle, a Japanese something or other. You have to put a powder on it to kill it. Then you have to keep small boy away from it for an inordinate length of time because of great fear and paranoia of poisoning. I worked in an ER and poison control 800 folks and ER workers can only do so much for a kid. It strikes fear into my heart.

This is some kind of purple daisy-like flower. It comes up automatically too. Now, I know this is not a weed, because J's Mom is into this sort of garden/plant stuff, and she has these in her neatly tended front yard.

This, behind the house, but off our property, is corn. Lots of it. Same fear of letting small boy near it. Fear of poison, and fear of losing boy in corn. I saw the first X-Files movie. I know what can happen in corn.